Unexpected Dependents

I think we've all been in this situation before: you're planning on having a quiet weekend at home, but for one reason or another, you end up babysitting someone else's kids, pets, or finicky geraniums. So what do you do? Well, that is the topic of today's blog posting – how to entertain other people's dependents.

First, address the dependent – introduce yourself and explain why the child/pet/plant is here. Also, inform the dependent that his/her parents/owners will soon be returning to reclaim the child/pet/plant. Let's be honest, if you skip this step it is not unlikely that the police will soon be at your door asking you questions like, “Sir, is that your ficus plant, or are you holding it ransom?”

Second, identify the dependent's needs. Does the child need to watch “Hannah Montana?” Or can you save yourself the agony and eventual insanity by convincing the child he/she needs to watch an episode of “Bones” instead? Does the cat need it's deworming medication? Well... if you want to keep your sofa clean, then yes... it probably does.

And third, identify enjoyable activities that you can share. A pie eating competition, a visit to the local zoo/theme park/microbrewery, or even a greased up piglet should provide hours of fun for you, as well as the child/pet/plant. And if you cannot identify activities that you can share, give the children the TV remote, nuke some fish sticks, and remember – it's just for one weekend...