Last Minute Treats

And I certainly haven't forgotten all of you holiday procrastinators out there, who for one reason or another still have yet to purchase your Halloween candy. Fortunately, should you not have the time to make it to the store before the trick-or-treaters show up on your doorstep, I have compiled a brief list of common, household treats that you can dole out with confidence.

• Factory-sealed bags of microwavable popcorn are always a fun and healthy Halloween treat for kids. Or better yet, hand out pans of Jiffy Pop – children love to watch as that foil-topped pan of popcorn balloons outward like some sort of aluminum tumor.
  
  
• Young children love stickers. So give them a couple postage stamps, some mailing labels, or even leftover campaign bumper stickers.
  
  
• Young children also love fake tattoos. A rubber stamper of some sort (one that has your mailing address, the date, or even the word APPROVED in large letters), can be used to give the child a festive temporary tattoo on the hand, arm, or forehead.
  
  
• For older children, cough drops and miniature bottles of Purell are a gentle reminder that cold and flu season will soon be upon us.
  
  
• And if all else fails, factory-sealed tea bags, tins of instant coffee, and cans of soda all make great Halloween treats. After all, the candy that every other house on the block is handing out will send pretty much every child in the country into a sugar-induced fit of insomnia. So I figure the children might appreciate a caffeine-laden drink the following morning before heading out to school.

After looking at this list a second time, I'm not entirely sure the term “treats” applies. But then again, the saying is “trick or treat” so I suppose the costumed children should expect a few less-than-sweet treats to end up in their Halloween candy bags by the end of the evening.