Wedding Planning, Part III

Another important step when planning a wedding is to introduce your parents to your future in-laws. And though most people leave this step to the last minute – allowing the families to meet during the the rehearsal dinner (or worse, the wedding) – I like to do it earlier in the wedding process. Let's be honest here, you're going to be spending every Thanksgiving, Christmas, birthday, and funeral with these people. And you need to know if you're going to be able to tolerate it. So, plan a get-together early, to help prepare yourself for what is to come.

And when planning that get-together, there are a few things to keep in mind. First, never surprise the family with the engagement announcement. Sure, a meet-the-parents get-together might seem like the perfect opportunity to announce your engagement. But nothing ruins a party more than your mother doing a spit-take over the surprising news. (Especially if that spit-take lands on your future mother-in-law's best dress...) So tell both your parents and your future in-laws that you are engaged well before planning a family meet and greet.

Second, plan out some conversation topics. I know this sounds kind of anal-retentive, but it will help. Let's be honest here, every first meeting is riddled with awkward silences. And you definitely don't want your socially awkward cousin getting nervous in the silence and sharing with all the world her most recent tales of bunion battling. So plan out a few topics of conversation, and use them as needed when the conversation fizzles out.

And third, if you're the one doing the cooking, don't try to outshine your future mother-in-law. This might seem a bit counterintuitive, but trust me. Every mother wants to believe that she can care for her daughter/son like nobody else. So slightly burn the steak to stay on your future mother-in-law's good side.