End of Days, Part XIX

As we near the end of the Mayan Calendar, is it quite likely that one or more of your friends will be inviting you to their pre-Apocalypse party.  So in an effort to help you select the perfect host/hostess gift to give your friend, allow me to offer you a few suggestions.

• A brain-shaped Jell-O mold - you can never have enough brain-shaped Jell-O when the zombies start to rise.
• Several floating pool noodles - they'll help keep your host's head above water should the world flood in a most Noah's Ark-ian manner.
• A basket of Twinkies - they'll last forever, making them the perfect Apocalypse food!
• A subscription to the duct tape of the month club - can't have too much duct tape.
• A Klingon-to-English translation dictionary - for when the aliens land.
• A 5 gallon bucket filed with sunscreen - it'll keep your host's skin nice a protected when the sun explodes.