End of Days, Part XXII

Let's be honest here, an ill-conceived guest list can ruin a party.  And that is especially true for your End-of-the-Mayan-Calendar Party.  After all, assuming that you and your guests survive the end of the world, you might be spending a rather long post-apocalyptic life together.  So in an effort to help you make the right guest list choices, allow me to offer you a few suggestions.

• Never invite a marathon runner to your party.  You want all your guests to be slower than you - that way the zombies catch them first.
• Never invite your psychiatrist to your party.  Otherwise, you'll end up spending the next few years answering the question "And how does the end of the world make you feel?"
• Always invite that hillbilly cousin of your's to the party.  He can make moonshine out of anything.
• And don't forget to invite your old frat buddy.  It's just not a party without the old frat buddy!